…people who work at the Registry of Motor Vehicles and have to deal with customers, that is. There is no way I could deal with so much dumbassery every single day, and not murder someone.

There was this long-assed line when I got there, everyone had to wait in it, in order to “check in”. Why they only have one check-in person working, I don’t know. It took forever for me to get there on the Evil Bus, and by the time I got there, I seriously had to pee. But the line was getting longer by the second, so I held it in and waited.

And waited. And waited. Why are people so effin’ STUPID? They don’t read the instructions. They want to do stuff at this location that can’t be done there. They don’t have the proper forms filled out ahead of time. Dammit, this is why, when license renewal or whatever is coming due, they MAIL you the flippin’ forms, with instructions.

Then you have people who argue about the fees, they bitch because they can’t get their license renewed unless they pay the excise tax on their vehicles that’s past due…it goes on and on. Seriously, I don’t know how the people who work there can stand it.

It was finally my turn, I had my form ready, I got a number and was told where to wait. There were 12 people ahead of me for license renewals, so I went to find a place to pee.

The restroom doors both had signs on them saying that the keys were available at the front desk…the same one that I’d been standing in line forever to get to. The line to it was now about three times longer than it was when I got there. But I noticed that the door to the men’s room was slightly open. Any port in a storm, I figured, and I went in and used it. Then I left the door open so that others could pee without having to wait for the stupid key.

I had a few new craft magazines that I hadn’t read yet, so I’d brought those along for something to do while I waited. But I was also sort of listening to the transactions going on. I panicked when I overheard an RMV person ask someone for a Social Security card. I hoped that this wouldn’t be required for me, the only time I’d ever been asked was when I first got a license here. I don’t have a Social Security card, thanks to the ineptitude of the Evil Post Office. So I would have been in deep shit if they’d required one.

Nope…all they wanted to see was my old license…I took the vision test, which was still a joke, and passed it. But I might not have passed it with the scratched, cloudy glasses, good thing I remembered that I had this other pair. Had my mug shot taken, paid my forty bucks, that was it.

My picture really does look like a criminal mug shot. I could have had the lady re-take it, but I didn’t want to bother wasting anyone’s time. It’s a license photo, not Glamour Shots. But sheesh, the lighting is so harsh, I don’t think ANYBODY looks good in these photos.

Also, she made me take my glasses off for the photo. That’s something new, maybe it’s yet another dumbassed Homeland Security rule or something. It sounds right up there with not being allowed to wear hats or sunglasses when you go into the bank. It’s kind of stupid, though, because I wear glasses all the time, and I thought the mug shot was supposed to identify me as me. I wonder if now I will be asked to remove my glasses every time I buy a beer at the ballpark and have to show ID. Because that pic sure doesn’t look much like I do normally.

I scanned it, and you can see it after the jump. Yep, I’m a brave soul…

This is just the temp paper thing. It looks even worse in color. I guess I could have at least smiled, but after waiting at the RMV forever, the only time you smile is when you are out of that place.

Actually, I didn’t want to smile until I got home. I had to take the dreaded MBTA to get to this place…one bus and one stop on the train was the quickest, although not the cheapest, way. But it had gotten cold and rainy by the time I left the house, and I didn’t want to be standing around forever waiting for a bus connection. For once I didn’t have trouble with the Charlie card stuff…in fact, I even put some more money on mine with no problem. ‘Bout time they worked the bugs out of that system…I admit that now that it’s actually working, it’s a pretty good system.

I figure that there are going to be times when I have to use public transit, so I’d may as well have the plastic Charlie card and keep money on it. Next week, I want to go into Boston, to the Beer Works near North Station, to watch the Red Sox Fenway Park opening day game (and World Series ring ceremonies). It’s either take the T someplace, or walk to the Skeevy Corner Bar, which I’d rather not do.

But still…I wish there were some way that they could have a minimum hygiene requirement to ride the T. Maybe put stink detectors in the Charlie machines, and if you stink too much, the doors won’t open for you? In general, the T is so dirty, and I couldn’t wait to get home and wash my hands and all. I’m just glad I don’t have to ride it every day, like I used to.

Well, I survived the RMV, now I don’t have to go back there for another ten years…I can renew online next time. And thank goodness I was able to pass that vision test!