I really need to rant…

…about the inconsiderate assholes at the beer fest last night!

Inside the event, people were very well-behaved. The fest has a new rule that says that you can no longer buy more beer tasting tickets than what is included with your admission ticket. This, I feel, is a very good thing. You get 12 tickets, and a tasting glass which is about twice the size of the suggested 4-ounce tasting. Most of the breweries filled said glasses almost to the top, way above the 4-ounce line.

We’ve found that 12 tickets apiece is MORE than enough. Mike actually used all of his, but I only used nine.

The problem was using the coat check. It was very cold and rainy, and I paid the three bucks to check my jacket and umbrella, so I’d not have to lug it all around at the crowded festival. I went light, because it gets HOT inside the event…just short-sleeved fest T-shirt and jeans…no bag or purse, everything I needed was in my jeans pockets.

Big mistake on the coat check thing. These people behaved worse than feral jungle animals. I waited in line to get my jacket and umbrella back, yet so many drunken morons were pushing and shoving to get ahead of me, once the taps closed at 11:15, and they’d downed their last beers.

It got so bad that I was almost pushed down to the ground a few times. Mike, who had wisely kept his jacket with him, pushed into the line to stand next to me, so that I’d have something to hang onto should I get pushed again. Which I did. Many times.

Some stupid jerk yelled at Mike for being next to me in the line, when he already had his jacket. Mike calmly explained to him that he was there to keep jerks like him from pushing me to the ground to get THEIR jackets. The guy said some stupid thing, and I lost it on him.

I whipped out my camera phone, and said that if he, or anyone else, did manage to push me to the ground, I’d take a picture of them and it would be online within minutes, with the caption “ASSHOLE”. And it would be…not just on this blog, but on Flickr. And later there’s be an explanation as to why said person was an asshole.

Clearly he, as well as some nearby bimbosity who was pushing me from the other direction, didn’t think that such a thing was possible, and just laughed. I don’t think they’d ever even HEARD of Flickr. Oh, how I wished I had some fiber optic cables or something handy, so I could strangle all of these drunken losers.

I finally did get my jacket and umbrella, without getting knocked down or killed. But I’m still very upset by this behavior…what was the damned RUSH, anyway? Were these barely-old-enough-to-drink losers looking to get out to the bars before last call? What time do bars in Portland close, anyway? One AM? Two AM? I haven’t a clue, I just wanted to get back to our room. I had NO interest in getting to a bar before last call, I’d already had my fill of beer at the fest.

People like this piss me off. I go to a beer festival not to get shitfaced drunk, but to taste the latest brews from some awesome breweries. The entertainment they had was great, as well.

Mike and I actually make sure to get different samples, and let each other taste them, so that we can each try as many as possible, with the 24 tickets between us. We actually TALK about which beers we like and don’t like, and why. I’m a big hops fan, the hoppier, the better, but Mike isn’t into that…he likes the aroma hops and beers that are more sweet than bitter. We’re actually INTERESTED in trying the beers, not in seeing how drunk we can get.

We treat it as a TASTING event. That’s what I always thought this was supposed to be in the first place.

But then we have people at the coat check, pushing and shoving, acting like complete asses. Most of them were WELL under 30, from what they looked like, probably not used to drinking good beers (most of which are *higher octane*) than your usual Budweiser swill. I wonder why they were even there in the first place, cheaper to go to a bar and just drink the swill. None of the really young-looking (under 30) people seemed to be talking about the beers, they were just looking to use up all their tickets before the taps closed.

If I ruled the world, the beer fest would be a 30+ event. For most people, once they reach that age, they are less likely to get shitfaced drunk and act like asses in public. Yeah, Mike and I did both get a buzz on at the fest. But did that make us push and shove to get to the front of the coat check line? NO! We’re veterans, we can hold it. We also don’t suck it down at a mile a minute, like these young kids do. Also, neither one of us even acted like this when we were in our 20’s. Well, there WAS that time when Mike got arrested when he was in the Navy…but I swear, it was just that one time, he learned his lesson after that.

I don’t know if we’ll be going back to this thing next year. I also noticed that a LOT of breweries who’ve been there in the past have been no-shows this year. Maybe they’ve seen the *barely legal* crowd, as well, and realized that these aren’t the people who are going to buy their beer in the future. These aren’t the people who mark off the checklist of beers that we’re given upon admission to the even, and talk about them. They just wanna get drunk!

But WE care about the beers, and we’ve found a couple of new ones to look for at stores and restaurants. We do almost every year, and we buy them when we can find them.

People like this, like the drunken assholes who push and shove and act like asses, do NOTHING for the craft brewing movement. They just perpetuate the stereotype that ALL beer drinkers are nothing but a bunch of drunken louts.

And this shit seriously pisses me off!